Birth & Death & Everything in Between

I am going to be an auntie!!  My sister and brother-in-law are expecting and I couldn’t be more excited!  I have grand plans to spoil this child silly.  As happy as I am though I am still in quite a bit of shock that my baby sister is going to have a baby herself; I still remember the day she came home from the hospital.  I don’t expect this shock to recede either.  It will likely grow along with her belly!

Meanwhile at the bank I am going through our estate account files in order to remove those that are closed.  Estate accounts are those that are set up by executers of our deceased clients in order to deal with any incoming or outgoing finances in the name of the deceased.   I just do a search for the client’s name, verify them by their birthday or SIN number, and then check if there are any accounts with balances.  I then put the hard file in the appropriate location.  One hundred percent easy and a mindless task to say the least.

Something I didn’t anticipate is how much it has affected me.  It is just so sad opening up these files of dead people, seeing their wills and death certificates, some have funeral receipts, and others even have handwritten letters with instructions from the client.  The most recent one had a three page letter that was dated three months before the date of his death.  I’ve come across husbands and wives that died within months of each other and others that were years apart, and still others that died completely alone.  I haven’t decided which is more sad.  And some were so very very young.

I have only been directly affected by death once (other than pets) and that was when I was six.  My best friend in the entire world, Tyler, was killed in a truck/train collision.  So I don’t have much experience with this subject (for which I am grateful).  But these estate accounts, coupled with the baby-to-be really has me contemplating my mortality, where I am in life, and for perhaps the very first time I can hear the whisper of a biological clock ticking in the background (the last of which scares the ever-loving-crapola out of me!).

I’m not sure where to channel these thoughts either so they are just hovering around in my cluttered head causing trouble,  making me feel unsettled with the direction of my life.  Yet I can come up with no course of action that is any better than the one that I am on.

All well, I will just plow through the rest of the files and then focus all my attention on just how many ways I can spoil the little blessing when it arrives!


~ by savasana on August 1, 2007.

3 Responses to “Birth & Death & Everything in Between”

  1. Congrats on a new family member! It is through those tiny little ones that we celebrate life the fullest. Let me know if you want me to knit anything for the new arrival 😉

  2. Why I believe the baby would just love a brand new Shells-made entrelac scarf lol!! 😛

  3. Cong Rats!!

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